Chinese walls and palm tree justice

BusyBody was talking about her case at chambers tea yesterday which involves a student appealing a decision by his college to expel him. ‘It was a complete kangaroo court,’ she said.

‘I’ve always loved the image that conjures up,’ said TheVamp. ‘You know, a huge kangaroo of a judge and all the little joeys coming up before him and with none of them able to sit still for a second. All bouncing up and down on the spot trying to make their submissions.’

‘It’d make it quite hard to keep their wigs on,’ said TheBusker.

‘It’s Chinese walls which make me chuckle,’ said UpTights. ‘I just imagine a huge wall of takeaway boxes separating two halves of an office.’

‘Palm tree justice has always done it for me,’ said TheBusker. ‘Makes my mind wander to hotter climes than this.’

‘I always liked the idea of lawyers going on fishing expeditions,’ said OldRuin.

‘Always brightened up even the most dreary day in court.’

‘As for skeleton arguments,’ said OldSmoothie. ‘They make me think of two skeletons stepping out of a closet, squaring up to each other and then one of them saying “I’ve got a bone to pick with you”.’

BabyBarista is a fictional account of a junior barrister practising at the English Bar, written by barrister and writer Tim Kevan. For more information and to read posts from the last few years visit Cartoons by Alex Williams, author of 101 Ways to Leave the Law.

August 12, 2014 · Tim Kevan · Comments Closed
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