Mid-life crisis for lawyers

‘I’ve decided to specialise in human rights,’ said OldSmoothie in the clerk’s room today.

‘Will that be for or against?’ asked BusyBody.

‘It’s always been a particular passion of mine and I think it’s about time I started to reflect that in my practice,’ he replied, ignoring her dig.

‘This is just the mid-life crisis he has at the end of every cold dark winter,’ said UpTights. ‘Last year he said he was standing on an existential cliff looking into the vortex of time.’

‘Yes, and how did he put it the year before?’ said BusyBody. ‘Hanging in the balance between the weight of the paths untrodden and the thought of moving forward being like walking on thin ice.’

‘It’s always thin ice when you’re OldSmoothie,’ said UpTights.

‘Particularly with his stature,’ said BusyBody.

‘And each year he somehow resolves this deep conflict by having an affair with an instructing solicitor,’ said UpTights.

‘Or even a pupil,’ said BusyBody with a grimace.

‘So I assume your sudden interest in civil liberties has nothing to do with a certain conference which is coming up in the Caribbean?’ said TheBusker.

‘Or that you can then put the holiday you’ve already booked against tax if you just turn up for the first five minutes of the first day?’ said BusyBody.

‘Er, no, er…’ stammered OldSmoothie.

‘I’m afraid he’ll be a little disappointed if that’s what he intends to do,’ said UpTights. ‘They’ve made it absolutely clear that they will be publishing a list of delegates online and those that only turn up for part of it will be put in their hall of shame for all the tax authorities to read at their leisure.’

OldSmoothie’s mouth suddenly dropped open and UpTights gave him a sympathetic look. ‘I should know, my darling. I’ve been going to that conference for years.’

BabyBarista is a fictional account of a junior barrister practising at the English Bar, written by barrister and writer Tim Kevan. For more information and to read posts from the last few years visit babybarista.com. Cartoons by Alex Williams, author of 101 Ways to Leave the Law.

November 26, 2013 · Tim Kevan · Comments Closed
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