Year 2, week 6: TheMoldies

TheMadOldies (perhaps TheMoldies) arrived into chambers today.  Not sure what the collective noun would be in this case.  A cackle?  Whatever it is, they certainly lived up to all expectations.  Last year there was a rock band called The Zimmers with an average age well above even the Rolling Stones but they had nothing on this lot.  There were seven of them in all and apparently there are more in the background.  Doesn’t really bear thinking about.  All of them have anti-social behaviour orders which are aimed at stopping them from causing various kinds of idiosyncratic offence.  An eighty-five year old man, for example, says that he can’t stop doing moonies every time he sees a police car go by.  Another seventy-five year old lady says that she gets into these moods where she feels compelled to chuck buckets of water on any teenagers she sees going past her house, however polite they may be.  Another eighty-one year old man has recently taken to dribbling a football with him wherever he goes.  That not only includes the local shops but even extended as far as chambers today.  Though I have to admit that I enjoyed it when he dribbled into UpTights’s room shouting, ‘He shoots, he scores.’

Now whilst this might be unusual behaviour, you might ask simply whether these people are starting to suffer the terrible effects of ageing diseases such as senility.  This is no doubt what the other side will say but they were having none of it.  Apparently, there are a load of them that have gone down with these effects all within the space of six months and they all blame this on the local wireless internet zone which has recently been installed in the school nearby and which overflows into their houses.  Either this or the mobile mast which has also been installed recently.

Well, as you might guess, whilst it was a colourful conference, there was very little I could d at this stage.  If we are going to get anywhere, we will need some evidence, a vital part of the case which at the moment is lacking in almost every regard except for the clear signs of symptoms.  Given the speculative nature of the litigation I have suggested that the solicitor perhaps investigate getting an environmental group to provide some financial assistance. 

Either way the case isn’t going away any time soon and it should provide a bit of colour to my practice.

November 7, 2007 · Tim Kevan · Comments Closed
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