Year 2, week 4: Ernest

After all the excitement of getting onto BigMouth’s case in the last week or two I was brought crashing down to earth with a bang today as I was sent off to Ilford County Court to fight a car case worth all of £350.  He said, you said, they said.  They were all at it.  Never ceases to amaze me not only how important clients take such matters but also opponents.  The judge, naturally and like myself, was completely bored but my opponent, who I’ll call Ernest, was jumping up and down all over the place and droning on for hours.  He arrived with a big skeleton argument and a bundle of authorities on car accidents about three inches thick.  One copy for me, one copy for him and one copy for the judge.  I shudder to think how many forests are wasted each year due to absolutely and utterly pointless photocopying by lawyers.  And that’s just the cases I see.  Times it by a trillion and we’re probably nearing the damage done to the environment just by their paper usage alone.  Which of course is before all the hot air they let into the atmosphere as I’ve mentioned before.  Started me off daydreaming about my opponent being buried under the mountains of paper which are wasted.  Drowning out his whiny voice in the process. 

At the very least you’d think they’d have re-cycling bins at court.  Maybe they could even introduce costs sanctions for wasting paper.  Or in my opponents case, wasting everybody’s time as well.

October 22, 2007 · Tim Kevan · 6 Comments
Posted in: Uncategorized

6 Responses

  1. Edward - October 22, 2007

    careful sounds like you are developing morals….

  2. Criminal Hack - October 22, 2007

    “All of £350”? You should try doing some criminal work. In a good day as a 3rd six/junior tenant you’ld be grateful to earn half of that!

  3. Joe Neville - October 23, 2007

    @Criminal Hack
    I’m afraid BabyB is actually saying that the case itself was worth £350, as in that is how much the Claimant was seeking. The fact that this is on the Small Claims track, with no costs order at the end, shows that BabyB’s brief fee must have been quite a bit less!

  4. fran - October 23, 2007

    Fast track RTA Case – Skeleton argument – which planet?

  5. Jason - October 23, 2007

    I’m sure DJ Kemp was thrilled when presented with the skelly!

  6. Martin - October 25, 2007

    Normally barristers are rather good at taking directions on issues like this. For instance, the pointed one of “Thankyou, Mr X, you may take it I am aware of all recent road traffic legislation”.